pentacletier

wow
sometimes i realize i'm bad at loving people. i cant keep girlfriends for more than a month because im stupid. ive lost my last girlfriend because i'm ignorant and dont love and care enough. and now shes happy with some other person and i guess now i realize i still love her but now she's taken again. as soon as we broke up she started dating someone else whos also a friend of mine. i kind of realize the pain some exes go through now. like, i never really understood because i thought, why would you love someone who you broke up with in the past? and now i kind of just know the pain.
i dont want to admit i still love her because shed probably say 'oh' and switch to another topic. plus shes still taken so whats the point in telling someone you love them when they're already happy with someone else? and i dont want her to cheat on him for me. i dont want anyone to cheat. cheating's horrible.
i guess the only thing i can do is wait. maybe then ill have my chance again. she did say that we could try again sometime and i just gotta cling to that small line of hope.
she doesnt love me anymore. i know she cares since shes my go-to person now and all but, it just kind of really hurts.
im just glad she doesnt know my account on here so i can finally post this.